When I was just 36 years old (birthday on January 6), the new year was not a happy one. I had made a fool out of myself at Christmas dinner with my family. My marriage was falling apart. The months before my birthday had me having my first black out and throwing up at a friend’s house – something I never thought would happen to me. I passed out and my husband had to take our toddler home as I slept in the guest room. My life was completely unmanageable!
Two women in my life were sober. One sister and one dear high school friend. They listened and my sister invited me to visit her outside of Boston, so I went. I watched “Hello my name is Bill” while she was at work and I went to my first AA meeting. I cried through it.
One of my character defects is envy. I wanted years of sobriety from the start. When I asked my sponsor about how she got 7 years, of course I heard her say” One day at a time.” I celebrated each month for the first two years. When I had 24 years, I marveled that my months had turned into years. I prayed to reach the number of years that would be half my life. I only had to go to meetings, help others, do the step work, make amends, and not die before I got there.
On January 6th this year I turned 72 years old. On February 1, 2026, I celebrated 36 years of continuous of sobriety. Now I have been sober half my life! My life now exists of two halves. Before sobriety and in sobriety.
The other day I realized a few things. On February 1 in Seattle, where I got sober, many people celebrate because the sun sets AFTER 5PM – a sign that the days are getting longer and winter is going to end. February 2nd is Ground Hog Day when we wait to see if the ground hog will give us hope or go back undergrown. I remembered the movie Ground Hog Day when Bill Murray lived the day over and over again until he could change his life for the better. I lived ground hog day for many years while I drank. Over and over again I wanted to change but didn’t, wanted to stop drinking, but didn’t. The fellowship of AA, especially the women, held me and taught me how to live a sober life so I could make it to the second half of my sober life. It is a life worth everything. Thank you.
Libbie S.
